A Day for Giving Thanks

Today was a cold crisp day in the Northwest, the rain had finally subsided and I could see a spot of blue sky over downtown Seattle. This was my opportunity to see downtown dressed up for the holiday’s before I leave town.

It wasn’t snowing but there was a definate chill in the air. As I walked down the street, people were bundled up in big winter coats; some wore hats and gloves and most were lugging holiday packages. The major department stores are geared up for the Holiday Parade scheduled to hit the streets of downtown Seattle this Friday. All the large picture windows are decorated and lights twinke brightly for as far as the eye can see.

Beyond the beautifully decorated windows and the twinkely lights, I saw a community struggeling to survive. I wasn’t prepared to see large numbers of homeless people standing on street corners holding signs begging people to give. Their eyes spoke volumes of their pain and lonliness. For them, I imagine Christmas is just another day. There will be no tree or presents to buy, no homes to decorate or friends to entertain. I turned the corner and came face to face with a man sitting in a wheel chair. He had no coat just a shirit and torn thin blanket across his lap, his clothes were worn, his hair in tangels. He just held a tin can. No sign. Looking at him said it all. As I walked past him, I turned and looked into his tired crystal blue eyes. Where did he go at night I wondered? Did he have food for tonight? How did his life go so wrong that he ended up on the streets begging for change?

I walked another block and suddenly I realized I had lost my interest in looking in store windows for the beauty of Christmas. 2009 has not been a good year for America. The economy appears to have affected everyone, except maybe the man pulling out of the parking lot of the Rainer Club this afternoon in his new shiny red Porsche.

I walked back to my car and drove home. Coming across the bridge over Lake Washington, I looked south to see Mt. Rainer in all her glory. She was covered in snow surrounded in a light pink hue standing proudly as a symbol of the incredible beauty of this region. The vision was magestic and I began to give thanks for all the positive aspects of my life.

I am thankful I can get in a nice warm car and drive home from the streets of downtown and know that I have a beautiful place to sleep tonight. I am thankful I have food to eat and warm clothes to wear. I am thankful I overcame cancer and had family and friends to take care of me when I was sick. I am thankful God has blessed me with many gifts that give me the ability to earn a living - even during this difficult economy. I am thankful life has not left me jaded and bitter and that I have the capacity to have compassion for others less fortunate. I am thankful I have family and friends who love and support me through the good times and the bad.

This Thanksgiving don’t overlook what you are thankful for.

The Power of Place

As the sun sets over the Olympic Mountains I feel the seasons change from fall to winter. The air is brisk across my face as a slow moving wind blows off the waters of Lake Washington. Seattle’s pewter skies cast a dramatic backdrop to the billows of white rolling clouds moving north, blanketing the Olympic penninsula. The peace one feels here is tied to the land, the water and string of islands that line the coast from Seattle to Canada.

Closing my eyes, I hear the whispers of the Indian people whose culture is so connected with the spirit of this country. They understand how to listen to the spirit of nature, allowing it to guide them and embrace the harmony every spirit craves.

Driving out of Los Angeles, I slowly could feel a weight being lifted as I traveled north beyond the intensity of the city and its traffic nightmere. My restless mind could not be satisfied after overcoming my life’s biggest challenge. A cancer diagnosis had ignited my passion to reconnect with who I have become. The need to slow down and no longer take life for granted was impossible surrounded by distraction. Living in the midst of it, life is hard to evaluate when you find yourself in a fish bowl. Lying in bed following my last chemo treatment, I had glimpses of all that my life could be.

Separation from my disconnected life had become a necessity. God had intervened and blessed me with an opportunity to return to the Pacific N.W. to heal and reconnect with my lifes passion. The work I am doing here is valueable and honors a living legend, who at 88 is writing his life story. Our meeting was by chance, yet it has served to reinvigorate my interest in the world.

I have learned life is a delicate balance. The happiness we all seek lies in our ability to reconnect with our spirit. It takes time, commitment and concentration to disconnect from the noise of our world. Without doing so, we are lost. As I prepare to make my journey home, my confidence remains high that I have learned the value of listening to my spirit and to trust my feelings. Contentment is found in nature, in the relationships you value in your life, in carving out time for yourself and in the compassion and love you give to others. This is the power of our humanity – embrace it.

How Cancer Changed My Life

Everyone knows at some level that life is finite, but I never thought about it as concretely or as often as after my cancer diagnosis. Cancer survivors are acutely aware of our limited time on earth. It’s a side effect of mortality staring you in the face. Once I crossed that line in the sand, I realized my cancer experience had permanently affected my perception of time. The shift for me began during my second week of a 24-hour a day chemo treatment. Seven days of toxic chemicals corsing through my veins had left me exhausted. I spent my days lying in bed looking out my window, searching for the positive things that would come out of my battle against the dragon. I grew impatient and frustrated over the reality that I had ignored my passions and at mid-life found myself unfulfilled.

Everyday I reaffirmed that many more people today now survive cancer, but the thought that my cancer could be life-threatening rarely left my mind. I had always believed I would live to 85 or beyond and die happily of old age, but now my script could potentially end differently. That was reason enough to re-evaluate priorities. The process forced me to take stock in the friends who were there for me during my darkest hours, to painstakingly evaluate who should receive my time and attention from that day forward, I made a comitment to become actively involved in protecting our environment, and acknowledged the importance of living my dreams now. Starting over would provide the opportunity to redefine who I am. I had overcome the ravages of chemo and radiation and fought my way back to the land of the living. It was in that moment that I knew I could do anything with my life I wanted now that I had clear intention. We each have a purpose here; some of us take longer than others to uncover what that gift is. But once we find it, our souls are challenged to give it back to the world in full measure.

Like many cancer survivors, I am a realist. A year later, I am now in full remission and consider myself one of the “lucky ones.” I move forward with my life harboring the realization that my life could change again in an instant. My cancer could resurface, the battle could begin again, but right now I am cancer-free and there is nothing more important than looking forward to explore the many positives and gifts in my life. Living with purpose gives focus to everything. I have my life, I have my energy back and I conquered the dragon by maintaining a healthy positive perspective and the confidence to no longer settle for less.

No one says, “I’m glad I got cancer.” But almost everyone says “It changed the way I look at my life, my relationships, my career, everything.” Cancer taught me that life is precious and so worth the struggles that cross our path. I realize now the gift I was given was the clarity to see my purpose. Cancer is the most powerful motivator I know. I tell myself everyday that everything in our universe happens for a reason and each event leads me closer to where I am meant to be.

Birthday Reflections

On the heels of a cancer diagnosis, birthday celebrations take on new meaning. Turning another year older today, comes with a badge of honor that at one point felt so fleeting.

I have slayed the dragon and my reward continues to lie just beyond the rainbow arching in brilliant shades of green, yellow and pink, reaching high into the sky outside my window. It is a sign that my challenges will continue to be conquered through mindful exploration and a willingness to embrace the changing seasons of life. The path to the pot of gold at the end of my rainbow will come from the realization that I had the courage to sieze the day, to make a difference in the lives of others and in the process, found peace as my life was restored.

As I celebrate my new found freedom, the realization that I have overlooked the simplicity of life and its many riches seeps into my soul. God is telling me, “Life doesn’t have to be so complicated, take pleasure in the simple things and share that peace with others.” I vow to do this and make it my birthday wish today.

Each of us is given such a short time on earth to make our mark. Finding happiness is always within our grasp. For me, it has become a matter of changing perspectives as I grow older. Looking back on the journey of my youth, my path was thrilling, sometimes heart-breaking, continually full of wonder, and propelled by the freedom that comes from believing life will last forever. I would not change a thing. It was my path that took me to the doors of incredible long-lasting friendships, passionate love and a deep appreciation for the bonds of family. Now in mid-life, time passes more quickly. I am keenly aware I have less of it to make mistakes. I am blessed to harbor the feeling that all is as it should be. I have let go of the goals born in my youth, content now in the path I have chosen. I plot my course with intention, making use of the wisdom that comes with age.

My footprints in the sand may disappear, but my love for those around me will endure forever.

Exploring the Emerald City

Returning to the city of my childhood brings with it a sense of wonder. Seattle has changed while I was away, providing me the opportunity to see it again from a new perspective. The Pacific Northwest has always been known to harbor a string of pearls, but it’s Seattle that has grown into its role as crowning jewel of the region.

I return from Southern California after a five year departure, eager to uncover all that once made me feel so connected to this special place. I quickly calculate it’s more than just the changing skyline, crystal clear lakes, extensive hiking trails, diverse neighborhoods, incredible restaurants and eco-friendly mind-set. Nature and a sense of community play key roles in this city’s beauty and culture. Neseled on the shores of Puget Sound and Elliott Bay, Seattle is blessed to have breath-taking views of a chain of emerald islands set against a backdrop of the Olympic Mountain range.

An arieal view captures Seattle’s vast web of bridges, and waterways that seem to spread out across the city like legs of an octopus. Each bridge serves as a gateway into a series of culturally diverse neighborhoods full of treasures to explore. Blue waterways are the veins to the region, breathing life into each neighborhood it touches. The beauty of Lake Union in the north section of the city branches out into the Lake Washington Ship Canal, Portage Bay, the Montlake Cut and east into the vast stretches of Lake Washington. To the west, Elliott Bay flows south around Harbor Island, the Port of Seattle and connects into Puget Sounds incredible vistas beyond Alki Point. As if these views aren’t enough to hold you captive, the blues are offset by miles of natural green trees. Many say the eco-movement began here. How could anyone doubt a community surrounded in such beauty would do anything less than start a national movement to preserve what the majority of American cities only aspire to become. For those that live in the N.W. taking care of the environment comes with living your life here.

When searching to find this city’s soul, it is important that one understand the deeply engrained conscienciousness here. It’s about community first, full of people willing to reach out and connect to their neighbors. But it’s also in large measure, all about the weather. Seattlites are very in tune with the rapidly changing atmospheric conditions of their region. The lush green landscape, christened it “the Emerald City” and green equals vast amounts of annual rainfall along with months of pewter skies.

As fall approaches, the local Eddie Bauer store becomes a busy place. Gor-tex can be seen flying off the shelves after just two brief days of rainfall. Wardrobes change quickly here and people seem to embrace any excuse to wear sweaters on chilly evenings. As the leaves begin to change from green to red and a fog bank rolls across Lake Washington in the early morning hours, I remember now why I keep coming back to this magical place.

For all the negative press Seattle gets over its rain, just ask anyone from Seattle in summer, “What is it you love about living here?” The universal response will be, “Just look around and you tell me.”